In the past several months, okay, maybe the past several years, I've struggled with this notion that I'm not DOING enough to serve the Lord each day. I tend to make myself feel guilty when I roll over and hit snooze at 5:00 am instead of jumping up and into the Bible immediately. And then 6:00 am rolls around and I barely have enough time to shower and get JM ready, so I push off my "devotional" time to... well, never, here lately.
So, I was talking to the Lord the other day while I was driving around, running some errands. I'm extremely honest with the Lord for those of you who don't know me. It was going something like this:
Me: Hey Lord, it's me... Kay. Oh wait, you already know that. I'm an idiot. Anyway, I was just thinking... I've been wanting to spend more time with you, and I think that the morning is really my only good time to do it because my days just get so crazy with work and JM and chores and supper and everything else (I speak in run-on sentences in my head). But, I mean, you know how much I love my sleep... and, so, well, sometimes... well, all the time... it seems like this morning thing isn't really working out for me because then I'm just talking to you while I fly through my morning routine, or while I drive, and let's be honest, you and I both know how ditzy I've been lately so I probably should keep my mind focused on the road (never mind the fact that I'm driving while praying this). But, Lord, am I a horrible person because of this? I mean, listen to me... I'm basically telling you that sleep is more important than you right now... geez. Why is this so hard for me????
And around this time, I'd gotten to the water works and was putting my bill in the little drop box (yes, I live in the 1920's). I'm walking back to my car, and He says, "Look."
I'm looking at the cutie pie sitting in the backseat of my car, smiling at me like it's the first time he's seen me all day, even though it's more like the 20th. It looked something like his smile in this picture:
And then He said, "I get that excited too."
Y'all! Is that crazy love?! Even a glance in His direction makes Him that excited. So, I realized that even five minutes is better than nothing. He just wants ME. It's a work in progress, that's for sure. But I'm definitely seeing it through different lenses this week.
He just wants YOU. It doesn't have to be formal, a certain period of time, or anything like that. All He wants is YOU.
Thanks, Lord. You're pretty awesome.
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